A Question From a Therapist I Can’t Stop Thinking About
Here’s something Lianne Lindner shared in a team meeting recently that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about.
She said that when a client feels stuck, she sometimes invites them to imagine this:
What if your life were a movie… and you were the main character?
What would the audience be yelling at the screen for you to do next?
I’ve been turning that question over in my mind ever since. It immediately helped me see what my own next right step might be.
Here are some ways this could show up.
You know that moment in a movie where the main character is clearly exhausted but still saying yes to everything?
Still answering texts right away.
Still overexplaining.
Still trying to be who everyone else needs.
And the audience is practically standing up in their seats shouting:
“Stop doing this to yourself!”
Sometimes when we’re living inside our own story, it’s hard to see what feels obvious from the outside.
We normalize stress.
We minimize hurt.
We explain away red flags.
We keep pushing forward because that’s what we’ve always done.
But if your life were on a screen, someone who cares about you would see the pressure you’re carrying right away.
And they’d want something different for you.
In movies, the turning point usually happens when the main character tells the truth.
When she asks for help.
When she makes the scary phone call.
When she sets the boundary.
When she chooses herself for the first time.
That’s when the story changes.
Try this for a minute.
Imagine watching your life from the outside like a scene on a screen. What would you be rooting for yourself to do next?
Would you want her to:
stop second-guessing herself?
say what she actually needs?
walk away from something that’s draining her?
reach out instead of handling everything alone?
Sometimes clarity shows up the moment we step outside the role we think we’re supposed to play.
You’re allowed to be the kind of main character who changes direction.
One of my favorite things about this idea is how simple and powerful it is:
Stories are meant to move.
If something in your life feels stuck right now, it might mean you’re in the middle of the story, not at the end of it.
And sometimes the next brave step is smaller than you think.
Sending the text.
Scheduling the appointment.
Saying no.
Letting someone see the real version of you.
Thanks, Lianne, for posing a question I haven’t stopped thinking about.
